I have a bit of an addictive personality. I get my hands on a new game and I play it until I beat it or I rage quit (even odds of either outcome). I find a new song/album/artist I like and I listen to it until I hate it. And I tend to take other random things and gnaw on them like a dog with a bone.
So this has been a way for me to relax and waste an INCREDIBLE about of time. When I think back to all the hours I spent working hard at doing nothing, I wanna kick my twenty-some-odd-self to get to work. Eventually, I did turn my focus to writing. It’s been a long road but along the way I’ve received much support, learned much of the craft, and managed to publish my debut book!
Lately though, I’ve been in a bit of a funk. Not sure what happened, just kinda lost the fire for it and… it’s starting to bug me now. I’ve had energy for things, lots of little side projects, ideas for podcasts, and new ideas for construction games like Kerbal Space Program and Minecraft. But all that has been a distraction, none of it is leading to my goal: to become a full-time author.
Sure, there is an advantage to building a personal platform: to gain exposure. But I’ve been pouring too much energy into these half-assed procrastination attempts. Time to full-ass into what an author does: write, revise, release.
I’ve been dragging my feet getting the print version of my book out. I need to buckle down and make sure the formatting is sound, finalize the full cover, and get it proofread (like I should have before the ebook was released) so I can get it out there. I can do more with a print book than just an ebook.
The edits for my second book have been grinding to the point its a real struggle to get my ass at my desk and actually work on it. The framework is all there, but trying to fill the gaps has been a challenge. But brick by brick I’m getting to together, just gotta keep at it.
I initially wasn’t going to do NaNoWriMo this year, wanting to focus my editing. But it might be what I need to kick start my creative juices and get the authoring sparking once again. I’ve got a rough outline that will be punched up before Halloween and then get going.
Having aspirations are wonderful, it’s how we can stand our soul-sucking day-jobs. But aspiration isn’t enough, it needs to become a passion. Maybe not all day every day, everyone needs a break, but it should be where the richest and fullest energies flow. I’ve lost that, but passions can be kindled back to ablaze once again. It just requires discipline, determination, and a reminder now and again that this is worth it.
Find your community, let its flame feed yours, and forge a light the world cannot ignore!